Guys talk about this shit all the time. See at some point in their life every guy is told that they're not a real man until they eat some ass. So my friend was educating a co worker of his on eating ass telling him that once he does it his girlfriend is gonna love him and not be able to get enough of it. He decided that he was going to finally try this whole ass eating thing. And just like everything else, the timing needs to be right. But his timing could not have been more off.
The young'n comes to work the next week and tells my friend that eating his girlfriend's ass was the worst experience he's ever had. The next question that arose was when and how did he do it. Always key questions whenever you're gonna stick your face right into a loaded chili ring. You have to choose when and how wisely.
He says they were coming home from being out and he just decided to pull over to the side of the road. They got into it in the back seat and he just went for with the home run swing and just stuck his face right in her ass. Well, here's the problem with this one my good man. You can't just go eat your girlfriend's ass after she's been drinking margaritas and eating chimmy chongas all night long at a mexican restaurant. The gun is hot. How do you not think about this?
The time to do it is right out of the shower when it's fresh and clean and you don't have to worry about a mouth full of toxic gas coming at you. Obviously when she's all sweaty from drinking and eating mexican food all night you're not gonna just think about how you couldn't get enough of the nachos grande and go in for the kill. A very big rookie mistake. You don't eat ass any other time but right out of the shower. It's a lesson you have to learn early, or you're in for the worst experience of your life.
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