Thursday, July 26, 2012

Why He's Really Dating The Ugly Chick...

 
We've all seen it before, the really good looking guy who's dating that ugly chick. Everyone sits there and wonders why he's with her, talks shit saying how he could get any other girl he wants and then says something about how great she must suck a dick. Or we also say how they both share an STD and are a match made in heaven. Regardless of what we say, I'm here to tell you that it might just be for show. It might just be for something bigger than we know about. 

Right now you're all thinking, "Steve, what the fuck are you talking about?" Oh trust me, I know exactly what I'm talking about. I've never done this before, but I've seen it done so many times that you might as well call me fucking in this department. Nostradamus. What does every fucking chick on the planet think about really good looking guys? Every girl thinks that every good looking guy is shallow. Now do you see what I'm on to? 

Not yet? Okay, I'll keep going. When girls think a guy is shallow, he needs to do something drastic to prove that he's not. Usually it entails getting fucked up and taking home a mongoloid. But the extreme good looking guys go above and beyond to assure that they will bang every hot chick that crosses their path when they're done. They wife up a fucking ugly chick for a little while. Why? Because once he gives the sob story to some smoking hot broad about how him and his ex broke up, she's gonna ask to see a picture. When he shows her the picture she's gonna be stunned. She's gonna say something like, "You can do so much better than her hun." Then she's gonna start making out with him, and it's in the fucking bag. He will never get turned down by a hot bitch ever again. It's fucking genius. 

I would gladly take four months of banging some troll under the bridge if it meant I was slamming tens for the rest of my life. Some think it's because he had beer goggle laser surgery, but I know the real reason. Beauty is not in the eye of the beholder. Beauty is beyond the horizon once bitches think he's not shallow. And that ladies and gentlemen is the reason that good looking dude is dating that ugly chick. 

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