Drunk Story Saturday's: His Life Needs Some Re-Evaluating

 

Drunk Story From Chief Iowahu (NYC) 

"It was one of those nights that you didn't plan on, but it was bound to happen eventually. My best friend and me decided to go out for a night in New York City on a Tuesday not thinking anything crazy was gonna happen. The plan was to go out, grab some beers, and come home and go to bed. However, after about the third drink we knew that our night was not going to end up that way. A couple of my coworkers called me up to see where I was and I told them I was downtown with my buddy. They told me to meet them in midtown at some hole in the wall bar for a little while. Naturally, we went to meet them. When we got there they were smashed and we were well on our way. About 45 minutes in my friend looks at me and says, "Round em up, we're going to the strip club." Now this was a very upscale strip club, one that was a little too pricy for me and my buddy by ourselves. But when you have ten people on two bottles at a strip club, it's not that much money and strippers think you have money since you have bottles. Boom! Strippers were grinding on us like dogs humping people's legs just for the fun of it. It was insane. We were throwing dollar bills everywhere and strippers were giving out their numbers left and right thinking all my friends were gonna somehow pay their bills. Needless to say while I was on my way to blacking out my buddy and I left the strip club at about 4am. On the way home I was noticing that the cab wasn't going in the right direction. My buddy said, "Don't worry about it, I have a surprise for you." We get out right near this little hole on the wall alleyway where I thought I was gonna be killed. We go up the stairs and what do you know? There's a bunch of chinese girls waiting for us. My buddy paid for me as a gift and look at that, I was getting massaged showered and rubbed out while I was drunk at 4:30 in the morning. I tipped her and we went and ate chicken and rice and it was all over. After this I realized that my life needed some re-evaluating."

First of all, I love that you sent in your name as Chief Iowahu. Second of all, your life sounds pretty awesome to me. And third of all, who wouldn't want a trip to the jack shack at 4:30 in the morning? That's just a great night.