Thursday, September 22, 2011

If You're An Asshole, Dating Websites Are For You

 
You see what it says in the picture right there? "When you're ready to find the love of your life." That is what all these dating websites promise, they promise relationships, and the love of your life, and marriage. I'm just trying to figure out if an asshole has ever taken full advantage of this. Is anyone catching on yet? Let me explain. 

Every woman who uses a dating website is going in expecting to find a long term relationship. If you're a smart guy, who also happens to be an asshole, this is the greatest thing that has ever happened to you. All you have to do is meet a girl on one of these sites and take her on a date. You just have to put on this whole act like you're the nicest guy in the world and this girl is gonna melt. And when I say she's gonna melt, I mean she's gonna melt right into your bedroom because she's gonna think that you're her "soulmate". Why? Because that's what these sites "guarantee". 

You never actually have to talk to this girl again, and then you can just move on to the next profile on the website. You can easily get away with slaying massive amounts of women who think that they're meeting the love of their life. In reality, dating websites could be the greatest thing to ever happen to assholes since strip clubs were invented. I'm telling you, it has to be like fishing with dynamite.

I'm gonna say that you could continually get away with this method for about two years. A girl a week for two years is like 104 girls. That's not bad, but if you catch anything just make sure it's curable. But the best part is that all these girls are probably really good girls who just happen to think they're getting married to you so they just hop in the sack with you on the first date. You have it made on these sites if you're an asshole. I may have ruined dating sites forever just by this post. And I'm completely okay with that. 

1 comment:

  1. I think a lot of guys just creamed there pants at the thought.

    ReplyDelete