This Week:
52) Using your period as an excuse to be a bitch is played out
Previous Weeks:
1) You should've seen this chick I banged last night
2) Bet your ass that when we break up I'm gonna try and bang all your hot friends
3) I slept with your best friend
4) You look fat in those jeans
5) I've had better
6) All your guy friends are trying to nail you
7) You've gained a few pounds
8) I can't believe you let me go raw right away
9) Your sister is hotter than you
10) Let's have a threesome with your Mom because she didn't mind having sex with me yesterday
11) I totally forgot to pull out last night
12) The number of girls I've had sex with is about three times more than you think it is
13) You're not that hot
14) Your best friend is the biggest bitch I know
15) He calls you because he wants to bang you
16) I would go to jail to bang your brother's 16 year old girlfriend
17) You shouldn't be wearing that slutty outfit when I'm not around
18) I'm a great wing man
19) You give sub par head
20) How come I never actually get anything out of Valentine's Day?
21) Who wouldn't want to have sex with me?
22) Your performance in bed last night was not the usual
23) I can read you like a book
24) I get a hall pass this weekend right?
25) My dick is like a ten foot strand of fly tape, whenever I walk into a room vaginas just stick to it
26) There's a good chance of me being able to have sex with someone other than you this weekend
27) Is there a threesome with your hot friend in the foreseeable future?
28) What's your thoughts on the rusty trombone?
29) Your bitch friend is just mad because we have awesome sex and she hasn't been laid in years
30) I'm slipping it in your butt without asking one of these days
31) Your DUFF has to go, she's scaring my friends away
32) I don't actually cum half the time
33) At least give me a warning before you decide to tickle my butthole
34) Is a few minutes of 69 so much to ask for?
35) BJ's need to become a more vital part of the relationship
36) Don't be surprised when you get the shocker next time we're together
37) My goal is to make sure you can't walk normal tomorrow
38) If you wanna please me you'll go with the sun dress, if you wanna please the other vultures walking around with their tongues out staring at you, you'll go with the slutty short shorts.
39) Yes, that outfit does make you look like a slut.
40) There needs to be a Blumpkin in the cards somewhere in the near future for me.
41) I have no sympathy for your friend who just got dumped because she's a slut.
42) I eat a mean box, just ask your sister
43) Thank god you swallowed at will so I didn't have to hold your head down
44) The shower is meant for doggy style not for me to hold you up so you don't feel degraded
45) Your brother's are the biggest douche bags on the planet
46) That girl who claims to be your best friend, she's a cunt.
47) You only win fights based on me not wanting to hear you talk anymore.
48) If you're not pregnant, I really don't care that much
49) You period means anal sex
50) Your friend is hideous can you please stop lying to her?
51) If you would've just let me talk we could have easily swung a three way with that chick from the bar
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