You all know me. I'll be the first one to tell you to go out there and go harpooning for fat chicks. I'll be the first one to tell you to bang that ugly slob just to get your rocks off. And everyone knows I'll be the first one to have your back when people get on you about it. However, there are just some women that are so incredibly terrible that you will never be able to recover from it.
I had this friend who was trying to have a threesome with two of the ugliest women on the planet. Now I know what you're thinking. "Doesn't the threesome cancel out the fact that both women are not exactly up to par?" Absolutely not. When one looks like a meth addict and the other one looks like Danny DeVito with his shirt off, there is no canceling that out.
A good barometer to go by is that if you're drinking and she's not getting any better looking she is of the unrecoverable type. You can always recover from banging a fattie with a nice face or an ugly chick with a nice body. But banging an ugly fat chick is something that you can just never recover from. And think about the fact that you're drunk already. If you have problems getting it up with someone you're interested in, imagine putting a wildebeest in front of you.
There are just some nights where you're better off waving the white flag and admitting you're defeated than swimming to the bottom of the ocean and feeding on carp. Have some respect for yourself. Just remember, if there's not enough alcohol to make you do it by midnight, there won't be enough alcohol to make you do it by 4am. Walk away with your dignity and have a fresh start on your next night out.
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