It's Not About What He Wants, It's About What He Needs

Everyone knows that guy who just goes into a funk and is miserable all the time. Now matter what happens he's always so negative about everything that goes on and he never wants to have a good time. To be a friend, you need to get him what he needs. Just remember, it's not about what he wants, it's about what he needs.

What does he need exactly? He needs to get taken out by his friends, get absolutely hammered and then he needs a girl to sit on his face. What? Am I crazy? Why would he want that? Once again, it's not about what he wants, it's about what he needs. Sometimes guys need a nice chick with a fat ass to just sit directly on their face.

Getting your face sat on just straight up snaps you out of that funk that you're in. There's nothing like a nice ass with a great vagina perfectly placed on your nostrils to get you back out there with a smile on your face. It's like medicine without going to a doctor for the prescription.

Just remember guys, when you have a friend who is in the first stage of jumping off the empire state building, you need to get him out of the house with tons of alcohol. Then before he can think about being negative, you hit him with a hot girl who's ready to use his face like a seat cushion. Why? Because it's what he needs.