Don't you love watching a guy who's actually a good looking guy and can get a decent looking girl who just turns into an absolute savage when he starts drinking? After the second shot of Cafe Patron last night it was all over for this poor guy. Not only was she fat, but she was the worst type of fat chick. She was the annoying fat chick.
Anyway, back to the dude being a savage. He first orders like twelve shots of Cafe Patron for his group and then it was all down hill. He then swooped his way into the empty barstool next to two tons of fun and began speaking to her. Clearly blown away that a guy under 280 pounds would be speaking to her she was a little surprised. But then she started to think she was actually good looking.
She bought the first round of shots, more Cafe Patron. He then went on a killing spree buying so many shots of Cafe Patron that he ran up a bill of $240. His friends did what all good friends do in this situation and that is they kept coming over to him and saying things like, "Are you sure you want to do this bro?" And things like, "Do you know where you are or what you're looking at?" He claimed he knew exactly where he was and knew exactly what he was doing. I doubt it.
Why I doubt it is because he then started swallowing this fat chicks face. It looked like a 180 pound Jack Black making out with the 300 pound version of Gwyneth Paltrow in Shallow Hal. All that I thought in my head was, "Dude, you're an absolute savage." Just not giving a fuck what anyone says and harpooning some hogs at the bar. Who's got it better than this guy? Well, a lot of people but you get the point. There is no stopping a man who is in Savage Mode.
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