The Great Debates Hammer vs Slothy: Week 1 What's Better? A Great BJ Or Great Sex?

                       VS

Hammer

Slothy

Hammer's Case:

For this topic I will be debating why great sex is better than a great blowjob. It's actually not that difficult of a premise to argue. Why? Because oral sex is normally not enjoyable for both parties. Only the receiver is getting the pleasure in the oral sex department. The quarterback gets no glory here. Great sex is an equal opportunity employer. 

I'm sorry that I like to boost my self esteem by knowing that I'm giving women awesome pleasure. Even if they're lying to me, it's still a confidence booster. Does that make me a bad person because I like to be a pleasure giver? If it does then shoot me. But I'm not gonna apologize because great sex is great for both parties. There's nothing better than knowing you satisfied her as much as she satisfied you. For the sex to be considered great, both of you need to be equally satisfied.

Also, great sex makes you feel like the Alpha Male. A woman's vagina is her most prized possession. Her vagina is sacred. What is better than being inside of a woman's most prized possession? Nothing is better than that. It makes you the Alpha Male, almost making it feel like you are an owner of a vagina. It's like being the owner of a professional team. You reap all the benefits, but you don't have to deal with any of the bullshit. 

If you want to sit there and be the selfish person where only you get gratified, go with the blowjob. But if you want to really be the Alpha Male, then choose great sex. She gets pleasured, you get pleasured, and you don't have to hear her sit and complain about you only wanting to sit back while she does all the work. 

Great Sex > Great Blowjob

Slothy's Case:

Look, I'm not here to argue that one of these acts are shit and the other is gold. There's no debating that a blowjob or sex are two of the greatest things ever created.

However, when the debate between the two comes up and the question of which one is better arises (in this case, great sex, or a great blowjob) I'm going to have to defend my main man the blowjob. See, here's the thing...great sex is great...there is no denying that; however bad sex is still OK. There's an old saying that goes, "Sex is like pizza, even when it's bad; it's still pretty good." This is the basis for my argument.

Great pizza is fantastic. I'll never shit on pizza because I love it. Great pizza is noticeably better than mediocre pizza; a slice at DiFara's on avenue J makes you never want to eat neighborhood pizza again. However...if you're really hungry, that neighborhood pizza is still pretty damn good. (I hope everyone is still with the metaphor)

A blowjob is not pizza. A blowjob is sushi. A blowjob can be absolutely horrendous, it can affect you for days, just like bad sushi. Bad sushi is not like bad pizza. Bad sushi is not OK. However, great sushi is absolutely tremendous. Like eating little pieces of butter. Every piece is a different taste, different feeling, all of your senses just combining to produce a feeling of exuberance and glee, just like a great blowie. Not to be mean in anyway to pizza, but great pizza just doesn't come close to great sushi.

Mathematically the mean for sex and blowjobs look like this (out 0f 100) sex-(84.4) blowjob (65.8). As you can see the average score for sex is WAY higher. However, the standard deviation tells a different story. Sex Std Deviation: (3.1) Blowjob Std Deviation: (15.5). This means that the scores for sex were all pretty similar...if you go two standard deviations from the mean you would see that 95% of people gave sex a score of 90.6 or below. When looking at blowjobs two standard deviations from the mean you get 96.8.

Analyzing this statistics will tell you that although sex had a higher mean (avg) score, the highest scores on the scale were given to blowjobs; thus mathematically proving that a great blowjob is greater then great sex.