I know, I used the word "Christmas" fucking sue me. The new thing is people have to say, "Happy Holidays" but every dumb commercial, and every decoration in stores, and every song on the radio is geared toward Christmas. I'm not knocking your holiday, I love other holidays and 8 Crazy Nights is one of my favorite movies. I'm just saying that everything around spells out Christmas season. Therefore, I will compile you a list of "Things That Happen During Christmas Season" starting right now...
There is Christmas music on the radio 24/7
People NEED to go see that stupid tree in Rockefeller Center
Kay Jewelers and Jared will have an abundance of annoying Christmas commercials that take place either in the snow or in front of a Christmas tree
Your local shopping mall will look like Santa's own personal village
Somehow a commercial that involves a husband handing his wife a box that plays music will mean that there is a brand new Lexus with a bow on it in their driveway
Every car dealership will have an end of the year sale
Home Depot will be selling Charlie Brown Christmas trees
You will be given an ugly sweater at some point
You will see numerous dumb girls making facebook statuses about how they have just baked Christmas cookies
You will also see numerous dumb people making facebook statuses about presents and other dumb shit of that nature
The Giants will complete an end of the season collapse
We will be sued for using words such as Christmas, Hannukkah, and Kwanza (yes, that sentence alone can get you sued)
Starting today you will be asked what you're doing for New Years Eve at least four times a week
Confused children will ask you if Santa's real. You of course respond with, "No" while having a huge smile on your face
And of course...
EVERY girl will talk about how much weight she is gaining during this season...Here's a hint, stop eating so god damn much.
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