What Time of the Night is She Good For?

Look, you can believe what you want to believe about men and we can tell you whatever we want to tell you about us but the fact of the matter is that we are incredibly shallow creatures. We just are, it's how we were built and it's just what happens when you are made to think with your penis. Which brings me to our standards. The standards of what type of night certain chicks are good for.

What do I mean? I mean when you go out and you see the selection of women in the place you think at what point would you actually consider speaking to these women. Obviously you start with the better looking ones early in the night. The better looking she is, the more you are inclined to speak to her before you're completely shitfaced. But the hot ones aren't the only ones there.

You have your okay looking ones and your hideous and fat ones. The more you get turned down throughout the night, the more you drink and the more you plan on what time of the night you will consider talking to these chicks. The uglier she is, the later in the night your number is. Trust me, the 2am chick looks like Gwyneth Paltrow compared to the 4am chick.

It's like the saying there's a time and a place for everything. There is a time and a place to start feeding on the carp that is ugly and fat chicks. The more and more it looks like you're going to go home empty handed, the more your standards drop. Once we start getting passed 1am, we're talking some hideous creatures that we consider having sex with. I'm not saying we're proud of it, but we do it. Ladies, every one of you is good for a certain point in the night. But if you're noticing that you've only been picking up offers after the bar closes it's probably time to realize you're just that ugly chick guys bang because you're easy.