Okay, so the question that has been burning in the minds of people for the longest time now has to be when the fuck did Sammy Sosa become white? Like that's not an instagramed or photoshopped picture of him, that's actually him. He's fucking white. When the fuck did this happen? It's actually scary looking, he looks albino. I didn't know there could be albino dominicans, but clearly this could happen. Like if I was writing a horror movie, my killer would probably look like the white Sammy Sosa. He pulled a fucking Michael Jackson with this one. Just going from your run of the mill black guy to your not so run of the mill white guy. I'm in dire need of knowing how this works, and I need to know immediately. Someone please get back to me with this stunning development. And if you see him in your neighborhood, just be on the look out. Actually now that I look at him a bit more I see more of an It the clown look to him more than anything else. Looks like this could be the title of a new book: From Home Run Champ to Ashy Larry, The Downfall of a Major Leaguer.
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