Drunk Story from John (Rhode Island)
You know when you're in college and there's an epic party that everyone tells you about because you don't remember a thing? Yeah, that pretty much happened here with this story. It my my sophomore year and the upperclassmen decided it would be an awesome idea to throw a toga party. I mean really, it's the most unoriginal idea ever, but who doesn't wanna get fucked up in a toga in the middle of January? Right, everyone does. So we go to the toga party and I am three sheets to the wind before I even walk in the door. I'm pretty sure we took my car there, I didn't drive I think I just gave someone my keys and said let's go. Now from what I've been told, here is how it went down. We got there, the place was packed, and I was fine. I then see a girl who I was friends with and started talking to her. Apparently, she was just as drunk as I was. Next thing you know, I have people telling me all this crazy shit like her throwing me up against the wall and just sticking her tongue down my throat and us dry humping like we were the only two people at the party. It's even scarier when you don't remember any of it because you have no idea what you actually did, because if you know yourself it was way worse than your friends are making it out to be. I don't remember anything but waking up the next day and reading through my text messages. Needless to say, I was disgusted. I didn't go home with her, but I had texted seven different girls asking them if they wanted "The Business" and I only got a response from one. I then saw texts to the girl I was apparently making out with telling her to come over for "some serious D". I have no idea what the fuck I drank, but I ended up having to apologize to seven different girls and I had a lot of explaining to do. Oh, and I ended up having sex with toga make out girl four months later.
Asking girls if they want the business and telling them to come over for some serious D, might be one of the funniest things I've ever heard.
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