After getting ready to leave the wonderful land of all you can eat sushi last night, I turn to my left and notice a disturbance. Well I actually smelt the perfume and cigarettes first but then I turned and noticed the herd of stampeding buffalo. Let me tell you, it was quite the site.
Of course they get there and are being obnoxious right from the get go. You're all fat, stop drawing more attention to yourself than there already is. Also, stop taking pictures of yourselves with the flash on in a place that is adequately lit for pictures. Do you know how annoying it is when you notice a camera flash go off while you're just minding your own business? It's as annoying as your parents are when they ask you four million questions before you're about to leave your house.
Then they have to ask for the chop sticks as loud as they possibly can instead of just sucking it up and dropping the sake into the beer and drinking it. No, that's not good enough for these wooly mammoths. They need the chop sticks so they can obnoxiously bang on the table and draw more attention to themselves. Needless to say that when they banged on the table I thought the building was going to collapse.
I was only in their presence for about ten minutes and I wanted to shove a chopstick up my through my eyes. Word of advice. You're all like thirty years old and it's a Wednesday night. Shouldn't you be getting ready for work in the morning? No, that would make too much sense. You would rather get shithoused and show up to work the next day hungover so you can complain to your co-workers all day. This of course brings more attention to you. So it's right up your alley. Find some hot friends to go out with from now on. One DUFF is tolerable to deal with, but a group of DUFF's is impossible. That is not opinion, that is fact.
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