I have decided that since I now live in the city some of these public transportation stories are just too good not to share. For today's adventure, I had to take the T all the way downtown on my lunch break to city hall since getting a Boston resident parking sticker is harder than getting clearance to NASA. So on my way back I get on the T with about 3,000 college students and one seriously deranged looking man. So where does this homeless mother fucker decide to sit? Right next to me of course. How many stops do I have to go before I get off? Oh just about 100. I'm fine with this, until he starts talking to himself. At first its the normal nonsensical panic about being underground, but then this guy is apparently getting offended by everyone around him. He then starts muttering swears about people he can see on the train "I see him, standing there in that blue hat...I don't like him, blue hat mother fucker, thinks he can get off the train, fucking trains, can get off fucking trains he can't..." On and on until I decided I need to move before he strangles me with one of his dollar store bags. I politely tell him I'm getting off, so of course he moves approximately 1 inch over to let me out. Since I'm not a fucking traipse artist I accidentally tread lightly on his foot in my attempt to step over his 80 bagillion can collecting bags. Since this is obviously mine and society's fault, he starts freaking out at me. Thus I had to actually get off the train at this stop, then pay another $2.50 just to get back on the same train at the front. Fucking public transportation.
Have adventure stories taking public transportation? Send them to slata@talkofthetown.me
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