Best Superbowl Commercials of 2013

This post is already going to take me a ridiculously long time to compile so sorry folks no funny intro today I'm just too lazy to do it.  Anyways sorry for the delay, had to wait for all the videos to upload but here is my countdown for the top Super Bowl commercials for 2013:

First commercial of the game is the first one on our list.  I went to my Junior Prom alone, so I just wanted to applaud the dork that created his prom fantasy into a sick car commercial.  YOLO mother fuckers.

Also another gem that was up early in the game. I don't know what's funnier the fat gingers weight lifting or the little black kid saving a dude from a fire.  Both are great.  I'm just pissed I can't find the version where the kid head butts the bully at the end. 

This just made me laugh because like who the fuck are the people that got cast as dancing pistachios? I wonder if they knew that's what they'd be doing.  Like how I always wonder if the girls that do Vagisil commercials know what they are signing up for or if it's like porn where you sign a contract then find out how you're getting fucked after?

I'm doing this countdown and yes I'm a chick so you better fucking believe this hottie is getting on my list.  Like seriously, where the hell is this dude walking around? I like to think he's real and not computer generated.  The best part is that this commercial aired and the Kate Upton one didn't...us women are taking over the NFL I'm just calling it now.

This commercial is great because there really is always one rookie at the combine that just comes out of nowhere and has everyone riled up.  Although I personally think Tom Brady should have been cast for this since he absolutely sucked his way through combine and if he could go back now would kill it.

Doritos always kills it with the most random Super Bowl commercials.  Another classic.  I don't know why but I've literally watched this commercial 6 times and laugh every single time the goats yells.  AHHHHH..

If you did not secretly have a little tear in your eye after watching this commercial then you are seriously a soulless bastard.   I think this is what the Dodge Ram "God made a farmer" commercial was going for but they missed the whole it-not-sucking part.  This one almost beats the Clydesdale donkey commercial from a few years back, look it up if you haven't seen it.  Anyways, this would have hands down been my #1 pick except for..


THE COMMERCIAL THAT DIDN'T AIR.  No, not the Kate Upton one, everyone get off her jock.  As soon as the lights went out someone should have whipped together a marketing ad making a joke about Bane appearing in the Super Bowl.  Hell, Twitter had about 1,000 Bane and Batman jokes 30 seconds after it happened.  Some company could have literally recorded a 30 second cell phone video making a joke about it and I bet you it would have been all over the news the next morning.  Wasted opportunity people, to anyone in the entertainment world this is why you should hire this genius for your marketing staff.  And by the way I didn't make one Pollard or Lewis comment this whole post...until right now.  It's the end of the season so I promise this is the last time I'll say fuck off Pollard..until next year folks!