Remember Gentlemen, She Never Means it When She Says She Doesn't Want Anything

I'm at the florist yesterday picking up flowers for my girlfriend and some dude in a suit comes storming in all flustered. He received help picking out some flowers and then he looks at me and says, "Man, she said she didn't want anything all week and then today she tells me she wants something." Well gentlemen, I have a lesson for you.

Normally I would blame the woman for telling the guy that she didn't want anything. But realistically, I cannot blame the woman on this one. If you've ever interacted with women you should know that they never actually mean it when they say they don't want anything. EVERYTHING they say has an underlined meaning and it's ALWAYS a test.

I looked at him and said, "Dude, they never mean that. She just wanted to see what you would do. You failed the test." He looked at me and then put his head down and said, "You're right man. I should've known better." When she says she doesn't want anything, she actually means, "If you want some pussy, you better fucking get me something."

Don't be that naive gentlemen, she always wants something. If she says she doesn't want flowers, she means she wants flowers. Every girl wants flowers fella's, if you actually think she means it when she says she doesn't want anything, that's on you. You should know better. Why? Because they're women. And women want us to be mind readers. She's just giving you a puzzle and it's your job to figure it out. If you're actually that stupid to believe her, then get used to your right hand on a nightly basis.