Nickel Night...

Post by Vince of Reason:

Now let’s not get excited people. I’m not promoting a local bar that has a drink special of nickel drinks for an hour long. But what I am doing is telling you my definition of a “nickel night”. Some of you might find it clever, and use this term whenever you’re put in this situation, and some of you might think it’s corny. But personally I don’t give a fuck. So here it goes…

For us single guys who go out to a bar or club, our main objective is to get with a girl. Correct? Yes, if that does not that happen we feel like failures and that hour and a half commute back to Staten Island is as dreadful as watching the New York Mets play baseball. Now whenever we get into the place the first thing we do is scope the place out and look for the group of hot girls standing around that we plan on talking to sometime during the night. We set our standards high and hope to find a bunch of “dimes” aka “10’s”. But that’s not always the case since not every bar or club you go to has a bunch of smoke shows; and if there is they are probably already occupied by a bunch of pompous meatheads spending daddy’s money and telling them how “fawkin gawgous” they look.

If that’s the case you start looking for 7’s and 8’s, which are probably girls that are more on our level, but hey looking for “dimes” first is understandable since most of us are shallow, including myself.   So you keep the lookout going, you get a drink at the bar with your friends, you walk around the place a little more and at this point you can’t even find a 7 anywhere in the joint. So now you start to bug out and say holy shit there is not one good-looking girl here. You see some beastly looking creatures out on the floor and the word grenade is an understatement because the girl that just walked by you is more like an atomic bomb. It’s a complete nightmare and finally you realize the best you could do in the place is a 5, aka “nickel”. And for those of you who are clueless, a “nickel” is not someone to go bragging about the next day. It’s usually the type of girl who is on the heavy side but in her mind she thinks she’s hot.

Now I know this situation has happened to everyone who goes out at least once if not multiple times. But in this case you have two options: Either get really fucked up and settle for a “5”. Oh and by the way, you will probably regret it the next day because you got so intoxicated that I’m sure you did something even more stupid like give her your number. Then after ten minutes of waking up this obnoxious chick is nonstop texting you (I do not recommend this option). Or you have option number two: call it an early night, go home empty handed, and give it another shot next weekend. It’s your call people but this is your warning; BEWARE of the NICKEL NIGHT.