Defriendment Fridays

It feels so good to be back with this...

The Culprit: Justin (last name removed)

Status that broke the camel's back: "Just witnessed a train suicide........"

Reason for Defriendment: You're kidding me right? You're like a fucking chick just begging for attention. Be a man. Men don't post shit like that on facebook looking for sympathy and attention because we're traumatized. Grow a sack. Peace!

The West Coast Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Chicken Caesar Wrap

Late Night Programming: Extreme Waterfronts

Late Night Song: Babylon is Falling by Slightly Stoopid

Fun Fact: Odds of dating a supermodel: 88,000 to1...Sounds about right.

Late Night Video:

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Penne with Pesto and Chicken

Late Night Programming: Income Property

Late Night Song: Mr. Jinx by Quarashi

Fun Fact: Odds of getting away with murder at 2 to 1...That's 50-50 I'd rather take my chances on not murdering someone.

Late Night Video:

The West Coast Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Spicy Crunchy Tuna Roll

Late Night Programming: Burger Land (Travel Channel)

Late Night Song: Your Love by The Outfield

Fun Fact: Like fingerprints, everyones tongue print is different...I didn't even know there was such thing as a tongue print, you learn something new every day.

Late Night Video:

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Zucchini Sticks

Late Night Programming: Deranged: Charles Manson

Late Night Song: Know Your Enemy by Rage Against the Machine

Fun Fact: One quarter of the bones in your body are in your feet...Interesting stuff I find for this shit.

Late Night Video:

The West Coast Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Quizno's

Late Night Programming: EPIC (on Destination America check your cable providers)

Late Night Song: It's Just a Shot Away by Rolling Stones

Fun Fact: Men get hiccups more often than women...I would like to find out why, that doesn't make sense to me.

Late Night Video:

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Chicken Pad Tai

Late Night Programming: Mystery Diners

Late Night Song: Ain't Messin' Around by Gary Clark Jr.

Fun Fact: Brushing your teeth regularly has been proven to prevent heart disease...Which is good

Late Night Video:

The West Coast Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Chips with Guacamole

Late Night Programming: The Rock

Late Night Song: Summertime by Rascal Flatts

Fun Fact: Vitamin C and E pills may protect against sunburn and possibly reduce the risk of skin cancer, but there's no substitute for good sunscreen...Thought you might like to know that.

Late Night Video:

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Grilled Ham, Egg, Provolone, Cole Slaw and French Fries in a Sandwich

Late Night Programming: Best Sandwich in America

Late Night Song: Renegades of Funk by Rage Against the Machine

Fun Fact: A tight tie can affect a glaucoma exam, if you're having your eyes checked you shouldn't wear a tie all day...Sounds interesting to say the least.

Late Night Video:

Drunk Story Saturdays: You're in My Class Aren't You?

Drunk Story from Shane (UNH):
"It was the end of the semester and we had just gotten to the place on campus where all the drunk kids go to eat after they go out. I walked in and the place was packed as per usual. I then see a girl from my accounting class across the room and she comes over to me and says, "Hey, I know you. You're in my class aren't you?" I asked her if she was the girl from accounting and she said yes. I then asked her who she was there with and she said her friend from home and one of her roommates. Naturally I asked her what she was doing and then asked her if she wanted to come back to my room. Needless to say, she was more than thrilled to jump in the sack with yours truly. The sex was wild and unexpected and then I needed a way to get her out. I remembered she said she was with a friend from home. I said to her, "Shouldn't you get back and make sure your friend from home didn't disappear?" She thought about it for a second and then said I was right and she took off. Not only did I pick her up at a place that was the equivalent of a Seven Eleven, but I threw her out like a tramp when I was done. We call that a win-win." 

She sounds like a real classy lady. You must've bagged her while giving out your tickets to the gun show. Slobs crack me up. This one cracks me up because I'm willing to bet she wanted to part her legs like the red sea for you the day that she met you but just needed to wait for the right time. She saw you drunk and vulnerable like a baby fawn and went in for the kill. She succeeded and got her dick. You fell victim, but it probably wasn't so bad. At least it doesn't sound so terrible.

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Pulled Pork Sandwich with Cole Slaw

Late Night Programming: Deep Fried Paradise

Late Night Song: Slow Jamz by Kanye West and Twista

Fun Fact: As you age, your eye color gets lighter...Maybe I'll have blue eyes by the time I'm 60.

Late Night Video:

The West Coast Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Turkey with avocado, bacon and cheddar cheese on a whole wheat wrap

Late Night Programming: Endless Summer

Late Night Song: Californication by Red Hot Chili Peppers

Fun Fact: Aspartame has been studied more than any other food additive...And they still don't know what it does to you.

Late Night Video:

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: New England Clam Chowder

Late Night Programming: Love It or List It

Late Night Song: Rollin' by Limp Bizkit

Fun Fact: Mozzarella is the second most popular cheese next to cheddar...And I would take fresh mozzarella over cheddar any day of the week.

Late Night Video:

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: BLT with Mayo on Everything Bagel

Late Night Programming: REDRUM

Late Night Song: The Bounce by Jay Z

Fun Fact: American men who turn 65 this year can expect to live another 16 years. For women, it' another 19...That's old as fuck.

Late Night Video:

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: KFC (I'm sorry I had to)

Late Night Programming: BBQ Pittmasters

Late Night Song: Erase Me by Kid Cudi

Fun Fact: Chance of dying from choking on food 1 in 370,035...So you have really bad luck if you die from choking on food basically.

Late Night Video:

Sit On My Face Sundays

Carolyn Murphy

 VS

Amanda Kerr

In today's battle of suffocating my face supremacy we have Carolyn Murphy taking on Amanda Kerr. This is really a battle of what you prefer as opposed to who looks better because I think they are just about even, but they have a different look to them. Kerr has that young girl look to her with a little petite body that makes you want to break her in half while Murphy looks a little more polished with a little more meat on her. The one thing they both do have in common is they have great eyes. But in terms of who I want sitting on my face I think I'll take Kerr in this one. I just think her asshole tastes like candy just by looking at her. Chalk that one up for her this week.

Drunk Story Saturdays: The Impromptu House Party That Got Out of Hand

Drunk Story from Don (Central Connecticut): 
"It was the summertime and my two roommates and I were going back up to our college house to renew our lease. We figured we would go up, stay for a night, party a little bit and then come back home the next day. We went up that first day, went to the beach and hung out a little bit and then went back to the house, ate dinner and started drinking. There were a few girls who we were friends with still up there for the entire summer so we called them to come hang out. The first night wasn't the issue. It was the second night. We didn't plan on staying the second night but we kind of got peer pressured by the girls to stay. They said there would be more people up the second night and we could throw a party that wasn't out of control but just fun. Needless to say, things got out of control. It was literally a party like you would see while the semester was going on. People just making out everywhere, girls grinding all over guys sitting in chairs, one dude started stripping and girls were putting dollar bills in his waistband shit got intense. The guy who was stripping then fell off the table and bounced up like a champ. It was out of hand. Drunken slobs just all over the place in our house in the middle of July. It was the impromptu house party that got out of hand and it was one of my top 3 parties of my college career."

See that, see the shit you can do when you just wing it? That's what it's all about right there. Throwing parties on a whim and raging like there's no tomorrow. I love hearing stuff like this. I have also been known to strip at a party or two back in my hay day. I was in much better shape back then and could pull it off but now I would have to charge by the pound. Good story, nice job.

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Potato and Egg Hero with Hot Sauce

Late Night Programming: Pork Paradise

Late Night Song: Cochise by Audioslave

Fun Fact: Chance of dying from contact with hot tap water 1 in 5,005,564

Late Night Video:

The Late Night Special

Late Night Menu: Reuben Sandwich

Late Night Programming: Heat vs Warriors on ESPN

Late Night Song: Can't You See by Marshall Tucker Band

Fun Fact: Odds of fatally slipping in the bath or shower: 2,232 to 1...You must be the most unathletic human being on earth to do that.

Late Night Video:

Sit On My Face Sundays Returns

Heidi Klum

VS

Bar Refaeli

We can't vote on it this week mainly because the poll website decided to be a dickhead. Moving on, for the return of our Sit On My Face Sundays, we have a titanic grudge match. The old, wily veteran in Heidi Klum against all the rage right now in Bar Refaeli. Who would you rather have sit on your face? My choice is Refaeli for the sheer fact of everything that she has going on. Look at that picture. It's almost perfection. Not that Klum sitting on my face wouldn't be one of the greatest days of my life, but I'll take Refaeli in this match up.