5 Ways To Make Sure You Never Get a Drink At a Bar

For some reason there are customers at bars who actually think they are more entitled than every other customer in the place when it comes to getting a drink. Those people also happen to be the biggest assholes and the worst tippers imaginable. Yes, they do all five of these things I am about to mention. Here are 5 ways to make sure you never get a drink at a bar.

5) Bang on the bar: Whether you bang your empty cup or your hand on the bar doing this tells the bartender one main thing about you, you're a dickhead. If you can't be patient enough to wait until the bartender gets to you then you'll really lose your mind after this because there's a good chance he or she won't be making you a drink until they have NOTHING else left to do.

4) Yell at the bartender: Leaning on the bar and yelling out, "Yo," or "Excuse me," is basically a one way ticket to sobriety. You're not the only one in the place, when the bartender gets to you, you will get your drink. But when you make a scene and yell like you're the only person there, you're gonna wait a very long time. Don't show up the bartender, they're the one serving you.

3) Reach over and tap the bartender: Never cross the barrier between the customer and the worker. If you do, you can either get the fuck out or just wait there because there is no rule that says the bartender must serve you. I dare you to try touching a bartender, see what happens. You might as well just go to another place for the rest of the night because you will not be served.

4) Raise you hand from three rows back: It's crowded and you're nowhere near the bar. You can raise your hand like a little kid in class all you want but you're not getting a drink from back there. I don't know what makes you more special than the people waiting at the actual bar but unless you feel like being completely ignored I suggest you make your way to the front. Plus, how the fuck do you expect the bartender to hear you from that far back when it's crowded? Use your head.

5) Don't tip after being there for a while: Usually you have three rounds of paying cash and not giving a tip before the bartender will just put you on the back burner. Anything less than $5 after three rounds will constitute you now waiting or not getting served the rest of the night especially if one of those rounds is a round of shots. News flash, $2 on a $72 bill is more of a slap in the face than a tip you cheap bastard.