Is my Behavior at Chipotle Childish, or Genius?

For those of you who know me (very few of you) you know that Chipotle is legitimately my favorite place in the world. I love it. It's healthy, it's scrumptious, it's filling, and it's relatively cheap. Anybody who thinks that Qdoba or Uncle Moe's should be in the same sentence as Chipotle is an idiot and most likely a serial killer. If one of my friends was given the choice of Moes, Qdoba, or Chipotle and chose any place but Chipotle, that person would no longer be my friend and I'd report them to the authorities because they are 100% planning on attacking America, because they're terrorists and I don't negotiate with terrorists.

Anyways, on to how I behave at Chipotle. I need to know if I'm wrong in my behavior because I have a guilty conscious about it, but I justify it to myself and play mental gymnastics so at the end of the day I'm perfectly fine with my decision. It all comes down to the Guacamole. First off, if you don't get guacamole on your burrito's then I pretty much classify you as the same type of person who'd choose Qdoba or Moe's over Chipotle. Not only are you an idiot with an unsophisticated palate, but you're also a terrorist and you're going to Guantanamo Bay because I want to keep my country safe. Anyways, I digress, my decision to "scam" Chipotle comes down to the guacamole portion of my burrito.

The fact that it costs $2 extra for guacamole is a joke in itself, I understand that avocado's are expensive, but C'mon shun! So, if I'm paying $2 extra for my guacamole you sure as shit better pile that motherfucking shit on. Seriously, that burrito better be leaking guacamole...for your company's sake, because I will take advantage of you if you skimp me. Oh, you wanna put a table spoon of guacamole on my burrito for $2 extra...that's fine because when I pay, I'm asking for a water cup, and I AIN'T filling that shit up with water! Your fault Chipotle lady, thanks for the free soda. I don't feel bad about it because you screwed me on the Guacamole. Put a heaping pile of guacamole on my burrito and next time we won't have this problem, I'll ask for a water cup and I'll fill it up with water, no questions asked.

You be the judge, am I wrong in this situation. Chipotle is like a billion dollar company, I feel like I'm justified in my actions.

P.S. I'm filling the water cup up with soda no matter what.