Types of Guys

TYPES OF GUYS

The Alpha
The ultimate bro, kid's got more swag than Gronk after a TD.  He's fucking sexy and he knows it.  Most of the time he has a good job, so he's got money to throw around.  Type of guy that orders a drink without even asking what you like.  It's expensive and he paid for it, so he knows you're going to drink it.  Great body, usually has a shit eating grin on that cute face because he knows he is going to fuck a hot chick later.  Finding a guy that is actually good looking and successful is rare, so he has his pick of the litter.  He can be an asshole, but you put up with his shit because he's an alpha.  Celebrity type: James Bond.

The beta
The alpha's best friend.  He is the equivalent to the fat friend in a group of girls.  His buddies are constantly trying to get him laid, but he is known for not being able to close the deal.  Usually because he doesn't realize his role as the beta, and tries to pull the same asshole shit as the alpha.  But because he is neither good looking nor funny, hot girls avoid him like the plague and just compete over the alpha.  This makes him angry and bitter.  He will proceed to get obnoxiously drunk and start calling all the chicks sluts saying he wouldn't sleep with any of them anyways.  This ends up with him going home to masturbate using his own tears as lubricant.  In the event a girl does show interest in him, it's usually the fat girl in the group.  But because he has built himself up to believe he is an alpha, he rejects her in the delusion that he will get an 8 or 9 instead of the 3 that's in his league. Celebrity type: Any of the guys from entourage.

The Omega
My personal favorite: The hot nerd.  Like a girl that doesn't know she's hot, this guy grew up being tormented by all the alphas, but has a redeeming quality chicks find adorable.  Usually he's a musician or can turn your computer into C3PO (omegas will get that reference).  Most of the time he won't treat a girl like shit because he's just so happy someone actually finds him attractive.  Watch out though, some alphas will pretend to be omegas to get the unsuspecting sweet girl in bed.  Lines like "I've been through so much shit in my life that's why I have a dark and tormented soul" means: "I'm going to pretend to be sensitive so when I don't call you after sex I can blame it on my mental instability" These are also usually self proclaimed "nice guys." Don't fall for it, true omegas don't compliment themselves like that because they don't actually realize they have good qualities, making it easy for any girl to seduce them.  Celebrity type: Ryan Gosling.

I wanted to do a post on this so when I refer to these guys in the future you'll know what I'm talking about.  Also, the percentage break down is that 5% of guys are alphas and about 15% are omegas.  The other 80% of you are betas.  Realize your role and accept it.