5 Things Men Say That Piss Women Off

 

It’s not you I don’t trust, it’s him: This may be the dumbest statement I have ever heard.  I totally understand that another guy around your woman can make you jealous, that’s fine, even flattering.  But if you trust me not to cheat on you, what exactly do you think is going to happen? He’s going to pull some caveman shit an club me over the head? No.  In reality you’re afraid he’s going to use some suave move and seduce me.  In which case, you don’t trust me enough not to be influenced by his charm.  Or you’re afraid his dick is bigger…in which case you SHOULD be worried.

Want to meet up? No, I don’t want to meet up with you. I want you to be a gentleman and pick me up.  I don’t get this new trend where guys think you’re gonna be driving all over town to find their ass.  Sure hanging out for the first time should casual and everything, but that doesn’t mean you treat her like your bro.  We’re not asking for you to show up with flowers and shit, just pick us up.  By the way, if you pick a girl up she’s going to be more free to throw back a few drinks, which increases your chances of getting a little play.  And if she’s is a total bitch, you can drop her off whenever you want! A little gas money is worth the win win on this one.    

Are you PMSing? Never, EVER ask a girl this.  If you suspect it’s that time, get your ass to the store and buy her some fucking chocolate or something.  Any guy over the age of 15 should realize this, but for some reason we still get this stupid question.  Why is it stupid? Because it’s your way of saying “hey I think you’re a bitch.” And you know what? Having our period doesn’t give us the right to be a jerk to you, I’ll be the first one to admit it.  So if I’m mad at you, it’s not because of some mother nature shit I deal with every month.  It’s because you did something stupid and don’t even realize it. Sorry to be graphic here,  but women are the ones bleeding out the genitals every month, so I’ll be damned if I’m gonna let a dude use that as an excuse for something he probably fucked up in the first place.

:) , lol, yea: Ok so these are all in text format, but it’s still FUCKING ANNOYING.  If a girl texts you and you respond with one of the above, you are a douchebag.  Literally too stupid to formulate a response so you cop out with a symbolic expression.  Seriously, what do you say back to a response like that? Imagine if you’re talking to a chick and you ask her a question and she just sits there an smiles at you like a fucking moron. If it’s awkward in person, it’s awkward in text.  At least have the balls to end the conversation instead of letting it hang there like the dead fish you probably are in bed. 

Crazy:  Above all, this is the absolute fucking WORST THING you can ever say to a girl.  Let me capitalize it again, the WORST THING.  If you call a girl crazy, prepare to run away because I guarantee you she will show you what it means to be crazy.  You know why? Because every girl out there knows someone that is truly insane. And they are out there don’t get me wrong.  The stage 5 clingers, anorexic psychopaths, borderline ex girlfriends, I hate them too.  We all live in fear of being labeled as “that crazy girl.”  If a girl is really nuts that’s fine to say it. The problem is when a guy is acting like a douchebag, and a girl calls him out on his shit he just goes “she’s crazy.”  No, you being a dick to a girl and her getting pissed doesn’t make her crazy.  It makes you the reason why girls start acting like the fucking demon out of the exorcist.