Thighs of Steel

So this post is about a story my friend told me the other night, but in order for you to understand why this story is so funny you have to understand my hatred of man thigh.  No, scratch that, ANY woman's hatred of man thigh.  The part of a man's leg that hasn't seen daylight since he first shot out of his mother's vagina.  Man thigh is pretty much the equivalent to roast beef pussy.  It's gross, a weird color, and you just want to get past it without throwing up. Take this guy, hot body until you get to the top of his leg that looks like an extra part from Where The Wild Things Are.  I was under the impression that if you asked any girl she would tell you that the worst part of a guy's body is his thigh.  Apparently this does not hold true for one girl.

At a New Years party this past weekend my buddy starts telling a story about this chick.  A few months ago he meets this girl, likes her, so he decides to cook her dinner.  Now since this dude is friends with me you can safely assume he isn't the type of guy that pulls out all the stops to make dinner for just any girl.  I actually remember him telling me this story a few weeks ago, because he was angry that even after making this ridiculously awesome meal she didn't sleep with him.  I said, and I quote "dude, run." He decides to stick it out...sucker.

Fast forward to this week.  This chick has still not had sex with him. So he tried to cook a nice dinner again. After they start making out, he thinks things about to get hot and heavy. And they do...for the girl.  Apparently this chick starts dry humping the shit out of his leg and going crazy. Just absolutely gyrating on his leg and just when he is thinking what the fuck is happening she orgasms right on his thigh. Did everyone get that? She actually came from humping his thigh. I didn't know anyone but 12 year old boys could do that. And not only did this happen once, it happened two fucking times. After the second time, my friend had to excuse himself into the bathroom to rub one out.  I don't know what the best part of this story is, a chick getting off on man thigh, him actually going to the bathroom to get rid of his blue balls, or the fact that he was hammered and ended the story with this epic quote "dry hump me once, shame on you...dry hump me twice, shame on me."