So, I have these black friends. If you don't have black friends, you need to get yourself some black friends because they're just straight up an awesome time. The only thing is that I think all of my black friends are just completely immune to alcohol. Why? Because all they do is pound long island ice tea's whenever we go out and there is never an inkling that they're drunk.
No, this is not a racist conversation, you should know that. I can ask why all my dumb whop friends drink grey goose all night long? But I already know the answer to that one. It's because they all think that they have money and drinking grey goose will make them look appeasing to women. Well listen up you dumb ginnie's, grey goose is shit and no it doesn't make you appeasing to women (yes I happen to be a dumb ginnie but I do not drink grey goose).
Moving on, my black friends, I need to give you guys credit, two long island's and I'm feeling nice, three and I'm fucked. I've watched about four of you mother fuckers go out and pound seven long island ice tea's and be feeling just fine. You would look more drunk if you were drinking just water. And what I don't understand is that you're like me and you try to go out and get fucked up while spending as little money as possible. But after seven long island's with the tip you've spent about $95. It doesn't actually make sense to me.
But what I really want to know is why do you guys love them so much? What is it about a long island ice tea that says, "Hey, I wanna drink that,"? Because I have no idea why the fuck you guys drink that shit like it's candy. I need to know. Can I get an email? A comment? Anything? I just need to know why black guys love long island ice tea's. Immediately,
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