So You Want To Dance On The Bar?

After being out this weekend I noticed something that actually made me laugh. What I was laughing at was the absolutely absurd amount of women who were trying to dance on top of the bar. The place I was at had the DJ basically telling any girl who wanted to dance on the bar to just jump up there. So what happened? There was a battle that consisted of about 20 women trying to climb on top of the bar to dance, of which only 7 succeeded.

What did I find so funny about this? I find it funny that so many girls want to dance on top of the bar. Ladies, I don't expect you to ever think like this judging by the fact that you're all fairly naive to this fact. But do you know the message you send guys when you decide to dance on top of the bar? The first message is, "Wow, this girl is a whore." Now you may not be a whore, but remember, it's all about how people perceive you, not about what you actually are.

There is also another message of, "This girl is out of control and just totally turned me off." I know you're next question. "How are we out of control if we're just dancing on the bar?" Let's put the equation together here ladies. First, you are wearing a skirt that has half your ass hanging out. Add this to the fact that you're dropping it low like you're in a music video while barely being able to stand and that would equal out of control. Am I saying that I'm not looking at you do this? Absolutely not, I love watching you do this. But even though I love watching you girls do this, it's not making me think any better of you.

So do you still want to dance on the bar? You probably do. You're probably going to sit there after reading this and say how much of an asshole I sound like, but that's fine with me. That just means I'm doing my job. Speaking of jobs, you know what girls like to dance on top of the bar? Strippers. Keep that in mind the next time you decide to go up there to just "have some fun".