http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2011/04/01/Man-calls-911-when-strippers-dont-show/UPI-89611301644800/
Clearly this guy hasn't been laid any time in the past 10 years. First, to spend 1,000 dollars just on lap dances from two whores is absurd. Then they really suckered this poor bastard because they told him they would show up to his motel room for "on the house" lap dances. Listen bro, the strippers don't actually like you, they just like the fucking Benjamin Franklin bills that are hanging out of your wallet. Get a clue, and if you really want to spend money on whores call hookers not strippers. At least you'll get something out of it for the money you'll spend.
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